


To Really Know You

by HappilyInhuman



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: AU, Age Difference, Interdimensional Travel, M/M, Magic Revealed, Mentor/Protégé, Merthur - Freeform, Pining Arthur, Thrown Into An Alternate Universe, Time Travel, prompts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-30
Updated: 2013-10-30
Packaged: 2017-12-31 00:10:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,206
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1025019
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HappilyInhuman/pseuds/HappilyInhuman
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Merlin and Arthur are thrown into an alternate universe one night while attempting to confront a magic-using enemy, but neither of them expected that in any world, Merlin might be Arthur's mentor. Even more shocking is the strange affection which the Arthur of this dimension holds for his Merlin. Arthur discovers that Merlin is a sorcerer, feelings are hurt, Arthur struggles with accepting Merlin, and with becoming a better prince and eventual ruler. Eventually new relationships are formed.</p>
<p>Written for a prompt given by P7ro on tumblr.</p>
            </blockquote>





	To Really Know You

**Author's Note:**

  * For [p7ro](https://archiveofourown.org/users/p7ro/gifts).



> I hope you like it. I worked very hard on this prompt, so I hope it lives up to your standards.

The bright shining pieces of armour all fell to rest on the ground in unison with a rather large clang, and in a hurry Merlin had straightened himself up in his bed and was staring at the door to his bedroom. He had heard, clear as day the distinctive voice of the Prince, Arthur, and so luckily he had gotten the magically held objects down before the door swung open to reveal his larger form. “Merlin, have you-” He stopped and his eye brows rose when he recognised the pieces of his armour lying haphazardly around on the ground in Merlin’s bedroom. “Merlin, can you get back to work, I told you to get on it an hour ago.” Merlin jumped up from the bed and grabbed a piece of armour by hand, beginning to rub at it with the cloth until Arthur backed out of the room.

 

Arthur stayed a bit longer, though Merlin hadn’t expected it. Arthur continued talking, “We had another intrusion last night, and then another man was killed by the woods earlier this morning. We’re going to do an investigation, so I’ll need that shined before dark.” He said it simply before leaving, and by the time Merlin was bringing it to him it was only a few hours later, though it was only an hour before the sun would reach the edge of the sky. It was then, just as the last piece of armour was being secured onto Arthur, that the alarm was called. Arthur hurried down, and Merlin, curious as always followed close behind.

 

They could each hear footstep padding down the hallway, and so they went around toward it-Arthur was shouting at him before no time, “Go around that way and cover that ground to cut him off if he thinks to turn around!” That was how they had cornered the dark figure, and neither Arthur nor Merlin could catch sight of its face. It was a strange feeling the blast-although there had been signs that the intruder was a magic user-nothing could have prepared Arthur or Merlin for the jolt with went through their bodies and the immediately feeling afterward of having freezing cold water dropped over their heads. When they each awoke they were in a completely different place.

 

Arthur awoke, simply enough, in his bedroom, the sunlight of a new morning streaming in through the windows on to his bed. He curled up in discomfort, his stomach suddenly sending him vibes which said, ‘we may have to empty ourselves,’ and soon he found himself upon the floor, clutching himself before quickly forcing himself up and pretending the moment of weakness had never taken place. It was then that the memories slowly began to resurface, his fuzzy brain reclaiming its experience, and although he realised that Merlin was likely nowhere close enough to reply, he found himself calling, “Merlin!” He was surprised instead, when he heard a muffled reply.

 

Merlin was in a room only a few doors down from Arthur’s, obviously not his own bed, seeing as this one was quite obviously luxurious, soft and molding to his every curve. He was also curled up, but without the stomach discomfort which Arthur was quickly becoming acquainted with. He held the blankets tightly around himself until he heard Arthur’s voice call him from quite far away. “Five more minutes!” He heard himself replying, loudly to travel through the walls. He did enjoy a few more moments of bliss before Arthur recognised where his voice was coming from and the door slowly swung open.

 

 “What happened last night?” They finally asked together in unison. Arthur’s eyes widened when he caught sight of the doorway, and suddenly another Merlin, except taller and a bit more mature looking was staring down at him. This Merlin looked exasperated, especially when his eyes slowly moved from Arthur’s own bewildered face, to the face of the younger version of himself, and suddenly he spoke up.

 

“I don’t know exactly what’s going on here, or how you found your way into my bed, or this _dimension_ , but I know it can’t be time travel, your ages aren’t consistent.” The two boys gave him a blank look before he continued, “Prince Arthur looks older than he is in this dimension, but I look too young for this dimension, and so, you must be from another dimension.”

 

“ _Your_ bed?” Merlin asked, even more ecstatic than before, “You live in the castle, the _luxurious_ portion of the castle?”

 

“Of course,” This Merlin answered with pride in his voice, “I’m the prince’s mentor, or rather, younger Arthur’s mentor.” At this Arthur scoffed and straightened up further.

 

“You? My mentor? What hogwash.” He said simply, prompting this Merlin to furrow his eyebrows, and reply in a completely unamused way.

 

“Well what am I in your dimension?”

 

Arthur smirked, “Yeah _Merlin_ , what are you in our dimension?”

 

Merlin sat up in the bed, holding the blankets around himself like a shield, “I’m-” He cleared his throat, realising that everyone in the room was staring at him expectantly, “I’m only his manservant.” Merlin admitted, and damn Arthur’s widening smile. He was less embarrassed though, when he saw the stern look the older Merlin was giving his Arthur, a look that made Arthur’s smirk disintegrate. The older Merlin’s ability to do this left Merlin staring.

 

“Arthur, you may want to become used to my holding more authority than a manservant, I don’t know how to send you back to another dimension…though I can work on a solution somehow I suppose…” At this Arthur sent him a confused look.

 

“How could you possibly do anything to help us? This was caused by magic Merlin! Older Merlin! Whatever! There is quite possibly nothing that you could ever do to send us back home to our dimension even if you are my ‘mentor!’ It isn’t as if you’re a sorcerer!” Older Merlin smirked, shaking his head and sitting on the bed beside where Merlin was still curled up in Older Merlin’s blankets. Merlin looked up at the man in surprise.

 

“So you never told him in your dimension?” Older Merlin said, prompting younger Merlin to have a small freak out.

 

“Magic is banned in our kingdom!” Merlin said quickly.

 

“Why does it matter Merlin?” Arthur asked him, but instead of anger on his face it was simply disbelief. Why was the older Merlin giving him that coy look which said that there was something he didn’t know? Older Merlin drew back slowly when he registered the younger one’s words. Magic was banned? If Arthur found out about Merlin’s magic...is that why he kept it a secret? Arthur looked toward him now, “What did you mean? What are you referring to?”

 

“Nothing, Arthur.” He said firmly. His Arthur would usually never reply when he used that tone.

 

This wasn’t his Arthur though, “I’m not too sure that I believe you.” He looked toward Merlin who was still curled up and extremely red cheeked in horror and embarrassment. “Merlin, you aren’t - no, Merlin, you couldn’t be-” Merlin looked up at him with blank canvas for a face, the only trace of emotion a trace of sadness in his eyes, and then for the first time Arthur knew. “You kept that secret all this time, even from me!” He looked so upset, but strangely, the Merlins noticed, he was not angry, he looked sad and betrayed by Merlin. After a while it seemed, Arthur had thought that he had known Merlin incredibly well, and now it was thrust into his face that Merlin could never be right under a rule such as his father’s.

 

"Arthur, I meant to tell you eventually but...both you and your father both seemed so against it that even when we became friends I wasn't sure I could trust you, I meant... He tried to execute a child for Gods' sakes! I..." Arthur had left the room now and was pacing back and forth in the hallway, which in hindsight was not exactly a very good idea, seeing as young Arthur was given the ability to catch sight of 'himself.'

 

It was surprising to a new level however, when young Arthur, for some reason or other, pounced upon him and tried to knock him down. He saw only older Merlin from his angle on the ground, and so young Arthur said, "So now you are conjuring doubles of me, Merlin? I assure you I can take him down!" Arthur struggled, trying with difficulty to shake the younger version of himself off. It was then that both Merlins got up from their perch upon the bed and rushed over, each taking an arm of the younger Arthur and attempting to pull him off. "Let me go!" He said until he realised that there were two Merlins holding onto him. "Huh?"

 

"Arthur I didn't conjure them, they appeared and I would appreciate if you left prince Arthur in one piece." It was a strange sight for both of them, the way that Arthur suddenly straightened up and did exactly what his Merlin told him to. "Sorry Merlin." With that line Arthur could've exploded if he hadn't been too busy immediately yelling.

 

"Why are you apologising to _him?"_ He said quickly, and for the first time younger Arthur acknowledged that the older version of himself was a human being

 

"Well he's my mentor," he added, "I'm supposed to listen to him and to give thought to his opinion." Merlin couldn't believe it, the way this younger version of Arthur looked up to this older version of him with such a great enthusiasm. "I've... Always sort of looked up to him. He becoming my mentor was only the natural progression of such." Older Arthur though, could barely believe his ears! He was positively fuming, and all he could think was that there was no way that Merlin, a poor manservant, if given just a few years on him could have been his respected mentor. Arthur couldn't accept this, and so he found himself clambering up from the ground and heading down the hall back into his bedroom, closed himself in and left all three of them, two Merlins and a younger Arthur staring after him.

 

"Don't mind him Arthur." The older Merlin told his Arthur, "He just doesn't appreciate his Merlin." Then he gave the younger Merlin a pointed look which said, 'You may want to try and go after him.' Merlin headed down the hallway then and knocked his hand upon the door, but Arthur wouldn't answer him in his frustration. A few moments later a guard had come around the corner and so as a last moment attempt to make the doubles unknown, older Merlin ducked into his room.

 

"Arthur, your father would wish for you to join him for a word, and to bring...Merlin, why are you pounding on Prince Arthur's door?"

 

"Oh, Merlin was just trying to help me." Younger Arthur thought up quickly, "I somehow managed to lock myself out of my room...though I'm beginning to wonder when Merlin will remember he can just use magic..." Arthur on the other side of the door silently began to curse this younger version of himself, until he heard the guard's next words and let out a calm breath of air.

 

"Merlin, he asks that you accompany the Prince." Merlin gave a smirk and attempted to look unshaken at being asked to meet the Uther of this dimension. He followed the younger version of Arthur away from the door his own Arthur hid behind, and silently prayed that Uther didn't realise that he looked far too young to be the Merlin of this dimension. It was when he and Arthur had been ushered around the corner of the hallway that the older Merlin swept from his room and headed toward Arthur's, immediately able to open the door, causing Arthur to jump up from the bed where he had collapsed.

 

"Arthur, you may be older than the Arthur I deal with on a daily basis, but you already seem to act so much more like a child." He said immedaitely. This caused Arthur to furrow his brows.

 

"You know _Merlin,"_ he said slowly, "I could easily take a swing at you right now."

 

Merlin raised his eyebrows and crossed him arms before coming forward to sit on the bed, "So you solve your problems with violence? Even when it's unimportant? You better keep close watch on that Arthur, you don't want to become too much like your father." Arthur was surprisingly silent, suddenly realising the truth in those words. Merlin slowly continued, "I can see the difference you know? I made sure this Arthur had some manners!" Arthur scoffed.

 

"I simply find the idea of _you_ teaching me manners, _humourous."_ He said simply.

 

"My Arthur didn't think so." Merlin said quickly and honestly, getting up from the bed again and heading toward the window. He looked out upon the grounds and said all of a sudden, "So I'm your manservant? Really? Am I even any good at it?"

 

"Not completely terrible."

 

"Are we even friends? At least on good terms?"

 

"I _thought_ we were friends."

 

With that Merlin scoffed, "You know just because he didn't tell you that he was a sorcerer doesn't mean that he didn 't consider you his friend! Sure he kept a secret from you, but it was a secret which if known could have gotten him killed and he simply did not want to have to take that chance for anyone."

 

"But..." Arthur wasn't completely sure what there was he could say, "Okay, so maybe he did have no reason to trust me, but... I just."

 

"You can't blame him." Merlin said simply, "I'll leave you to yourself now then." Merlin left the room and locked the door behind himself again so that no one would discover the second Arthur inside the room. He headed back to his room just as there was a small crash in the room behind him, "Don't break anything that belongs to this Arthur, Arthur."

 

"So Merlin," Uther said from his throne, sitting there and looking just slightly uninterested in the situation in the moment, "I'm really quite interested in how Arthur has been doing at the moment." This, of course, caused Merlin to smile brightly, as he was just a bit less formal than his counterpart in this dimension, and so he found it too humourous that Uther had said he was interested when he clearly was not. He stopped immediately though when he realised that he had to do this well if he didn't want to get the Merlin of this dimension in trouble. He did find it mildly strange though when no one realised how young he suddenly appeared. He straightened up and squared his shoulders then in a last moment attempt to seem professional.

 

"Arthur has been doing exceptionally well." He tried, hoping that might be enough.

 

"Oh really?" Uther said, "So I assume that he has been able to sort out that issue he was having last week with the-"

 

"Oh yes, in fact, he sorted that out much more quickly than I had originally expected."

 

"Good, good."

 

"Oh god that was awful." Merlin said to the younger Arthur as they were heading back to Arthur's bedroom, "Your father, I see…is...the same as always.”

 

“So still positively wicked?” Arthur asked, prompting Merlin to look down at him with his eyebrows pulled up high enough to meet his hair line. Arthur was silent then, only looking at Merlin once every few moments when his eyes would dash onto him and then immediately off. Merlin realised it though, and he recognised precisely what that action meant. He was silent when they reached the hallway which their counterparts shared, and so Merlin ushered young Arthur toward his room and opened the door for him before quickly retreating to the older Merlin’s room and shutting the door pointedly behind him.

 

“Older me, we need to talk.” Merlin said with the most serious look on his face which he could muster up, he didn’t want his older self to think that he was being unserious or misinterpreting anything. Merlin looked up from his desk, surprised that Merlin had come in so seriously. He hadn’t messed up too badly, had he? “Arthur, seems to have a little crush on you! Us?” Older Merlin’s look of surprise dissipated.

  
“Oh that?” Older Merlin said, and again Merlin found his eyebrows raised to the full extent which he could manage. “He seemed to have developed that quite some time ago.” Younger Merlin began to pace back and forth in front of older Merlin's desk before he stopped in front of him a few moments later and began to speak.

 

"You're just letting him continue on having that strange affection for you? As his mentor that doesn't bother you at all?" Merlin asked, looked at the older version of himself with a look of disbelief upon his face. "It's not that he's a male, it isn't that at all, it's just that he is the prince and he needs to have a queen someday who will produce an heir, and you're, well, it's surprising for me because I'm used to being his manservant and not having him look at me that way." He was nearly breathless now with the words he had just said still ringing in his head. Older Merlin got up from his desk and put a hand on his younger self's back.

 

"You wish your own Arthur looked at you that way." Older Merlin said in a matter of fact way, as if there were absolutely no doubt in his mind whatsoever. "You give all of these excuses for why wanting Arthur to look at you that way is wrong, but you can't hide what is plain to see in your eyes. It's disbelief but it's also jealously and you should have known that you yourself would see through that."

 

"Want Arthur to look at me that way?" Merlin swore, "Never! He's such a spoiled prat all the time. Being friends with him is hard enough as it is."

 

"You don't really think that he's that shallow all the way through do you?" Older Merlin asked him, "If you really believe that then I'm sorry but that is your dimension and this is mine, my Arthur is quite different from yours, and I quite like the way he looks at me, thank you." He took his hand off of Merlin's back and straightened up before heading back behind his desk and sitting down, "Plus, you keep saying that you don't like your Arthur in that way, but... I don't exactly believe your words."

 

“I...um…” Merlin paused, looking up finally at the older version of himself and realised there was no way to elbow himself out of this. He was going to have to admit it to himself sometime, so why not when he was with another version of himself who could help him get through it? After all, this sort of chance only comes once in a lifetime-if you’re _lucky._ “So maybe I’ve begun to develop... _weak_ feelings for him, he’s still a clotpole! Plus, there is no way that my own Arthur would ever consider _me_ that way.” He was confused when older Merlin suddenly rolled his eyes and shook his head, though it made a bit more sense once he realised that he was about to lecture him.

 

“Don’t you understand why Arthur was so upset earlier on when he realised that you were magical and had never told him?” He asked, but he didn’t give himself time to answer it, “It hurt his _feelings!”_ He waited for a moment, looking at younger Merlin, and when he saw the confusion blossom on his face again he nearly facepalmed before continuing, “He thought he knew you, Merlin, but above all: he thought that you trusted him enough to _let him_ know everything about you. Now he found out that there was something about you that you lied to him about, and that _hurt_ him.”

 

Merlin froze up, as he had had no idea what Arthur finding out he was magical would hurt his feelings. He hadn’t really given it much thought before, so that concept that Arthur was hurt simply because Merlin had hid something from him was...shocking.

 

“Did it ever occur to you that maybe...he wanted to know things about you? Maybe he was interested in knowing you and just...didn’t want to tell you because he might be embarrassed about it or thought that he was childish?” He sighed, “Our Arthurs may be from different dimensions, but they are still different versions of the _same_ person, and I know my Arthur: he has pride, so sometimes if he thinks that one of his own desires is too childish or unacceptable he’ll be very quiet about it, he’s quite cautious about it. He gives subtle signs though-maybe you just haven’t been picking them up?”

 

“Maybe.” Merlin replied, “I mean...if your Arthur can fall in love with you, why couldn’t mine fall in love with me, right?”

 

“So.” Younger Arthur said as he slowly approached him in his bedroom, away from both the Merlins. “I suppose your own Merlin must be…” Younger Arthur paused, realising that he was talking to himself and could most definitely be honest with the older Arthur. “Your Merlin must be just as interesting as my own, huh? He must do great deeds as well.” He paused again in nervousness when he realised that the older version of himself was looking at him as if he had five heads. He laughed nervously and backed up slowly, “Right?”

 

“Merlin? Either of them? Doing great deeds?” Arthur asked, face disbelieving, “Merlin is my manservant.” He reiterated his statement from earlier that day.

  
“Maybe _your_ Merlin is a manservant, but _my_ Merlin is absolutely amazing.” Arthur said, in a tone that made the older Arthur shut up and listen to himself, “He’s always saving me, and everyone else from traitors, and hitmen, and dangerous foreigners, he’s always there when I need someone to talk to, _and_ , above all, he’s taught me _practically_ everything I know.” The older Arthur scoffed in disbelief, but the younger Arthur wouldn’t give him the chance to criticise him before he continued, “Merlin and I have a future together, Arthur, one where we work together, side by side on _equal_ ground.”

 

“I find that incredibly hard to believe.” Older Arthur refused.

 

“You know what, alternative version of me, do you know what I believe your problem is?” He asked, but it was rhetorical and he gave himself no time to reply, “I believe that you’re just a little bit more selfish than me, and I know why: You never had Merlin in your life until later in your life, when I was little I already knew Merlin and he influenced me toward being a better person! You most likely spent your entire childhood all alone with father. What an awful way to grow up! Even if you _do_ realise that Merlin’s gifts are amazing and can be used for the good of society, you’ll still be sidetracked by your own inability to see everyone but yourself as below you-as less important. The point is...the point is..” He voice got shaky here and cracked due to his adolescence, “I would _die_ for Merlin.”

 

Older Arthur remained silent, watching the younger version of himself tear up in his desperation for his older self to simply _understand._ He’d just told himself a terrible secret, and unfortunately all he got in return was further confirmation that what he wanted was so unnatural that not even an alternative version of _himself_ could understand falling prey to such urges. He was surprised when as a tear began its descent down his cheek, he felt a larger, warmer hand than his own grasp his shoulder. He looked up to see the older version of himself looking down in nothing but concern.

 

“I...I understand,” He tried to articulate his idea, “I understand, I suppose I just-I just didn’t want to believe it?”

 

“Well then how do you think I feel about it!” Younger Arthur said furiously, “I am here, and I’m completely and utterly enamored with Merlin, and I find myself so torn up and anxious, and I fear that at one point I even have began to take pity on myself.” He wiped Older Arthur’s hand from his shoulder and rose himself from the bed before heading toward a window and looking out into the early evening purples. “I realise now that although I was sad and misunderstood by Merlin, and had love for another man in a time when such a thing was unheard of...At least I admitted it to _myself,_ which is something you’ve never done. You know what? I give up feeling sorry for myself, the one I should feel so incredibly sorry for is you!” With that he left his room and headed downward with the intent of spending some time in fresh air.

 

For once in his life as someone screamed at him, Arthur had remained silent, watching, taking it all in, and more surprisingly, not arguing. In a way he found it incredibly ridiculous to fight with _himself_ , and so he watched himself go, not giving it much of a care. No, the care needed to go to analysing the words which had been said, realising exactly what it was that the younger version of himself was saying. A few moments later he had an epiphany, realising what the younger version of himself was saying.

 

Realising it was all true.

 

“Arthur!” Merlin called, knocking on the door to the prince’s room. It roused the older Arthur from where he had fallen to sleep upon the bed only a few hours before, he was surprised to see that the room was suddenly dark. He stood up groggily with sleep still in his eyes before heading to the door and swinging it open to look down at his own Merlin, and his eyes went only a little bit wider, and he slowly attempted to make his way past the sorcerer and out of the bedroom, “Arthur, stop, I have to speak with you!” Merlin said desperately, but Arthur grabbed his arms and pushed him gently back into the room before leaving him there, and heading toward the older Merlin’s room and shutting the door behind himself before collapsing his body weight against it.

 

“Not ready to face Merlin after revelations?” The older Merlin asked from where he was writing behind his desk.

 

“At this point, _Mentor,”_ Arthur said mockingly, “I am unsure I should ever be able to face my own Merlin again. This is incredibly embarrassing!” He said, and he was only angered further when he watched the older Merlin’s eyes slowly roll in their own lack of amusement.

 

“It’s absolutely humourous how you tend to find even the silliest things embarrassing, you don’t have a single understanding of the fact that no one chooses who they love...or that with Merlin by your side you’d only make a better king.” The older Merlin said, not at all as embarrassed as the younger Merlin would have been had he ever had to say such things to Arthur. He had known Arthur longer than the other had, knew how to deal with them a bit better, and had never had to hold anything back from the younger Arthur. Why, then, should he hide anything from the older?

 

“If that is true...then at least promise me this,” He was quite quiet, “That it was my destiny to fall in love with Merlin and that there was nothing I could have done to prevent it.” He said simply, his arms drawn up and crossed, stubbornly refusing to look up at the older version of the man he was dreading seeing.

 

“Don’t treat it like a curse Arthur!” The older version said, suddenly quite angry, “That is the worse mistake you could ever make, and Merlin deserves better than to be treated as if he is something not wanted.” The older’s eyes grew sad as they looked down at the older version of his Arthur, “You two may as well take the advantage you have,” He said, sitting back down in his chair, “Once you are king you can have any person of any gender that you wish, and no one will dare go against their king’s choices,” He paused, “But when my Arthur is king I will most definitely be too old. I have known for a long time that he loves me, but the age difference between us is what makes me fear he would not choose me.”

 

The older Arthur suddenly looked up at the older Merlin to see his sad eyes, and the sight made him sad on the inside as well, and he muttered, “Arthur told me...that he believes you two have a future together, on equal footing. He most likely intends for you to be his.” He finished, causing Merlin to reply slowly:

 

“Is that so?”

 

“Yes.” Arthur said quietly, the eye contact between the two that had only just been initiated already seemed too much. He tore his eyes away.

 

“Do you love your Merlin as much as young Arthur loves me?” The older Merlin asks, pleadingly.

 

Arthur pauses, hesitates, closes his eyes tightly and scowls that himself, “Yes.” He replies, “I had wished that I didn’t but there is not much I can truly do...now there is no way I can escape it, hide it, or deny it. I feel as though I am at the point where I am ashamed-not because I am in love, but because I am in the type of love that no one can know about until I am king-but I _do_ love Merlin, and I _do_ want him so badly. I thought I had fallen in a deep, dark hole and couldn’t climb out, but all along I was wrong. I had fallen in arms.”

 

Young Merlin tore his ear away from the keyhole, having listened to the conversation, and he was silent before quietly knocking upon the door to the room again, “Arthur, please, come out!” He yelled, and he heard Arthur jump from the other side of the door. For a moment he became quite worried that Arthur might be too embarrassed still - especially after what he had only just admitted to the older Merlin - to face him. His eyes dropped to his feet until he felt the air pressure shift and a low creak as the door swung open to reveal the tall blonde prince, not looking all too much like a prince if he were to be honest. Arthur was quite disheveled, his hair messed from when he slid down and against the door, and his eyes red and teary from the conversation he had just had with the older Merlin. He did look quite embarrassed to face Merlin in such a state-but it seemed he was tired of running from his destiny. “Arthur…” He breathed quietly.

 

“Merlin, I-” He turned to realise that the older Merlin was still peeking up at them from his desk, and the older Merlin gestured for them to get out of his doorway. Arthur grasped Merlin’s hand lightly and led him to the younger Arthur’s still vacant bedroom, sat him on the bed and then looked down at him, not completely sure what to say. He internally fought with himself before finally sitting down beside Merlin and opening his mouth to speak until Merlin interrupted.

 

“I heard what you said to the older me.” He said softly, brave enough to place a hand upon Arthur’s clothed arm, but he was surprised when he felt Arthur’s arms slacken slightly before returning the kind gesture. “I know that you’re ashamed of the fact that we would be in a secret illegal affair until you were crowned king, but...Arthur, I...I can’t help but feel that if our alternate selves are so sure of their love, then why would we not be able to feel so comfortable with ourselves as them? They accept their love for one another wholeheartedly, and I wonder if, maybe, we could have something just as wonderful. I think we have the potential.”

 

“If you’re this confident, then I know it’s possible, Merlin.” Arthur pointed out, slipping his other arm around Merlin’s waist and smiling when Merlin was unfazed by the contact. “If you want the truth from me than you should know that I might just have loved you from the moment I saw you, and when you had stood up to me I knew I was a goner-although I attempted to deny it to myself and had you humiliated so many times. Whenever I lay eyes on you, to look away again is a feat which could rival lifting the entire castle with one arm-impossible to do. I notice, no doubt you do as well Merlin, how incredibly stupid I sound! I think I might be happily writing poetry now! And you think I might not be incredibly mad for you?”

 

“Not many could make the great prince a man on his knees with poetry spewing from his lips, of love, no less!” Merlin laughed, and it was then, that the two silenced themselves, and the eye contact between them grew more intense, and the two took glance at one another’s lips, both wanting but neither wanting to initiate, until Arthur wound his other arm around Merlin’s waist as well, pulled him a bit closer-practically into his lap-and slowly braced himself as his lips began their descent. The dam broke when their lips finally met, slowly before being transformed by the flood of emotion that Arthur had now decided not to continue hiding. Merlin’s arms came to wrap themselves around Arthur’s neck as their tongues fought for dominance and Arthur slowly won.

 

“You love me…” Merlin whispered against Arthur’s lips in disbelief.

 

“Of course I love you Merlin, I just said so.”

  
Merlin smiled, “I love you as well.” He paused, “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about the magic, but I never would have imagined that the secret being kept from you would hurt you so much.”

 

“No,” Arthur said, shaking his head, “I was being a child, you had every right to keep the secret, especially when it was one which only saved your skin. It was self preservation-I completely understand.” He paused, “If I had found out before accepting how I felt about you-who knows what I might have done, I might have been so upset as to accidentally get you killed.” Merlin looked up at him with concerned eyes, and he was about to speak when Arthur continued, “And don’t tell me that you don’t think I would have made such a horrific mistake, because I would have, and I would have regretted it for the remainder of my life. At least by the time we’re returned to our own dimension I’m going to be calmer about it and…to be honest, I’m ready to forgive this now…on one condition.”

 

“What?”

 

“If you could forgive me for being such a prat that you felt you couldn’t even trust me with the knowledge of your magic.”

 

“Arthur!” Merlin says, “You are always forgiven!” Then he laughed, “It’s not your own fault that you’re a prat…you just can’t help it.”

 

“Hey!” Arthur said, but he was smiling, and then their lips met again.

 

“Arthur-” A voice called from beyond the door, “When are you going to stop mopping al-” Younger Arthur paused once he had opened the door and set eyes upon the two kissing figures atop his bed. They immediately broke apart when they heard the commotion and looked up at the intruder into their moment with large eyes until the younger slowly backed up out of the room, closing the doors in front of him before spinning on his heel and heading toward his Merlin’s room. He threw open the door with a knowing look upon his face before stopping in front of Merlin’s desk. “What happened since I was out?” He asked curiously, “I know you must have talked to one of them, you always were better at helping people in the right direction than I was.”

 

“I have spoken to Arthur, why?” Older Merlin asked, looking up from his papers.

 

“Well...let’s see...they’re snogging and feeling each other up on my bed for one…” Arthur replied, watching with glee as a flush made its way onto Merlin’s neck and cheeks as they each acknowledged that it was the equivalent of themselves snogging and feeling each other up.

 

“Well it isn’t as if I told them to!” Older Merlin exclaimed in his own defense.

 

“Well I know _that_ ,” Younger Arthur replied, slowly making his way around the desk that Merlin was sat at, “It just made me a little… _jealous_ is all...you know, he getting to kiss his Merlin and all when I’ve never gotten to touch you, not even _once.”_ He said slowly, stood beside Merlin now, watching as the sorcerer tried so desperately to look away.

 

“What are you trying to say?” Older Merlin asked slowly.

 

“What maybe I should have done _this_ quite some time ago, Merlin.” He sat down in Merlin’s lap slowly, hoping that just as the younger version of Merlin loved the older version of himself, his Merlin might love him.

 

“Your father wouldn’t approve, Arthur…”

 

“I’m tired of following his stuffy old rules and attempting to live up to his impossible standards.” He said, trying to get Merlin to look at him so that he could search his eyes.

 

“The age difference Arthur!” Merlin said in desperation.

 

“Do you really not love me?” Arthur asked, pain in his eyes.

 

“That isn’t it! Of _course_ I love you! More than anything I’ve ever loved before!”

 

“Then why won’t you kiss me?”

 

“I’m older than you Arthur,” Merlin said, taking hold of Arthur’s wrists, “I have to be realistic and try to do what is responsible and what is best for you.” He said, finally meeting Arthur’s eyes with a sad look in his own, “It’s my _job.”_

 

“So now you’re going to play the responsible adult card, huh?” Arthur said, pain in his own eyes now, pushing himself up and away from his own Merlin. He was tired of loving Merlin and never getting anything in return, of being treated like a child, and above all he was sick now because he had now seen what they could have had. Seen what it might have looked like, them together, kissing, holding one another. After seeing it right in front of him his heart had ached, and he had known that he had to try, but now he was beginning to wish he had never known Merlin at all.

 

It was a week before the older Merlin had been to able to figure out how to successfully send the alternate versions of themselves back to their own dimension. If was afterward, as Arthur sat silently near Merlin as they sat in the setting sun beneath the privacy of the trees that Merlin finally acknowledged Arthur’s terrible mood. “You’re still mad at me, then.” He said simply, not a question, but a statement which he knew was true, and there was no way that Arthur could deny it. He looked up slightly at the far younger boy who he loved so much, and Arthur did nothing but give him a slow, slightly depressed seeming nod as he acknowledged the truth in Merlin’s words. Merlin nodded at himself as well before finally saying, “I’m sorry Arthur, I know how you must have felt to be rejected but-”

 

Arthur suddenly jumped up, “Don’t you dare say that!” Merlin’s eyes widened, as Arthur had never screamed at him in such a serious, angry manner-not for years, not since they first met-before Merlin had had a positive influence upon him. “You don’t understand the way I felt, because you obviously don’t love me that way that I love you-otherwise, it wouldn’t have been so easy for you to turn me away!” He paused, tears finally collecting in his eyes after a week of holding himself together, “All the waiting I’ve done, Merlin! To have you tell me you love me then turn me away anyway? Am I supposed to believe you Merlin? Am I really?”

 

“Yes, because I was telling you the truth!”

 

“If you were telling the truth,” Arthur screamed back, “You would have kissed me then and there!”

 

Merlin stood up, “I was trying to do what was responsible!” He moved a few feet away from Arthur before sitting down again, his back to the younger.

 

“What if I don’t want you to be responsible? What if I want you to break all the rules for me? Perhaps I feel as if if you aren’t willing to, then you simply don’t love me as much as you swear that you do.” He got up slowly as well, approaching the older man the way he had done a week before, and when he reached him he sat in front of him, knees to his knees and Merlin’s head immediately swung down to hang so that he would not have to look upon Arthur. Finally he spoke.

 

“Forgive me all of this, Arthur, but I am _so_ conflicted.” He put his hands to cover his face as well in his exasperation. “I only want that is best for you.”

 

“I am not always sure what is best for me, Merlin, that is true.” Arthur said slowly, his head turned away from Merlin, and his hand absentmindedly playing with some twig or other, “But I do know that what is best for me is not a broken heart...and you are _all_ I have _ever_ wanted.”

 

Merlin slowly looked up, reaching his arm out and lightly placing his hand beneath Arthur’s chin. He struggled for a moment, wanting so badly to kiss the younger male, and yet he stopped himself only a moment later. “I can’t so this Arthur. You’re too young, and some day you might regret it.”

 

“I will not regret it.” Arthur said softly, looking into Merlin’s eyes now, “I’m not the only Arthur to have loved a Merlin.” He reminded him. “If it happens so often then it must be fate.”

 

“Arthur…”

 

“Please.”

 

“Your father-”

“It doesn’t matter what he thinks!” Arthur pled, sitting on upon his knees now instead of sitting, grasping Merlin’s shoulders and slowly passing into his personal space. Merlin froze and couldn’t move now, allowing Arthur to slowly bring their lips together at last. Merlin found his body betraying him, his mouth moving against Arthur’s in perfect time until they broke apart.

 

“I love you so much Merlin, rejection from you and my very soul would pain me.”

 

“I cannot deny you now Arthur, I’m tired of running away.”

 

“Then you are mine at last?”

  
“Yes.”


End file.
